Or so the saying goes. In the case of Sir John and Lady Lilian Butters, things were arguably more side-by-side as a team, rather than one standing in front of the other.

In 1924, Sir John Butters accepted the formidable task of completing both the physical and administrative infrastructure necessary to establish Canberra as the seat of the Australian government. Moving his family to what would eventually become the nation’s capital, Sir John spent the next five years as Chairman and Chief Commissioner of the Federal Capital Commission (FCC).

Known as “big, bronzed and direct of speech,” Butters was the driving force behind the FCC’s achievements, committed to high-quality development that avoided “terrible eyesores” typical of other cities. His work was formally recognized when he was knighted during the Duke of York’s visit for the opening of Parliament House in1927. Customarily, the title of “Lady” was immediately assigned to Mrs Butters.

Among the earliest major projects completed under Sir John’s oversight was the Hotel Canberra, originally known as Hostel No. 1 (1922–1925). More than just bricks and mortar, it was a vital piece of civic infrastructure — a meeting place for politicians, visiting dignitaries, and decision-makers during the city’s formative years. For Sir John, it represented the kind of physical architecture a capital needed: a space designed for connection, diplomacy, and the forging of ideas.

For Lady Lilian, those same rooms, hallways and terraces provided a different kind of blueprint. In the elegant meeting spaces of Hostel No. 1, she engaged with community leaders, built networks, and quietly championed causes that would form Canberra’s social architecture — especially for women. If Sir John ensured the city’s buildings had strong foundations, Lady Lilian ensured its people, particularly women, had them also.

A meeker woman may have taken a back seat to her husband’s ambitions and chosen to focus solely on her family and formal engagements, many of which were hosted at Hostel No.1. Particularly after having been recently transported from Tasmania to a burgeoning Canberra. But Lady Lilian was neither meek nor mild. She used her prominent social position to advocate for an equal place for women in the new city. The early days of Canberra saw men outnumbering women three to one, yet Lady Lilian worked to ensure women had space — quite literally — in the city’s sporting grounds, community hubs, and leadership circles.

Her leadership informing the Women’s Sports Association in 1927, her advocacy for the Canberra Mothercraft Society, and her later presidency of the YWCA in Sydney all reflect the same design principles her husband applied to urban planning: lay strong foundations, create pathways, allocate space purposefully, and build for the long term.

Soon after resigning in October 1929, the Butters family left Canberra. Relocating to Sydney, Sir John established a successful consulting engineering practice, maintaining an influential career until his retirement in 1954.

Once settled in Sydney, Lady Lilian Butters became the President of the YWCA, furthering her work in women’s interests. She played a particularly significant role during the World War II era, markedly contributing to the YWCA War Effort. During the war years, many women entered the workforce in unprecedented numbers, stepping into roles traditionally held by men who had gone to fight. As President, Lady Lilian was instrumental in organizing and promoting initiatives designed for these women working in essential industries and services, including the provision of safe accommodation, training and social support.

This war effort by the YWCA, under Lady Lilian’s guidance, contributed directly to a broader social shift. Women gained not only economic independence, but also visibility and recognition in professions previously dominated by men, and the confidence to succeed in the workforce. The association’s work during this period fostered community among working women and promoted the vital message that women’s labor was indispensable to the national cause. This was foundational for post-war advancements in women’s workplace rights and the ongoing movement toward gender equality in employment.

Together, the Butters embodied two sides of city-building. Sir John created the physical infrastructure that endures in landmarks like the Hyatt Hotel Canberra; Lady Lilian created the social infrastructure whose impact still echoes in women’s sport, maternal health, and workplace equality. One built the walls, the other filled them with purpose.

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